I need to implant a microphone in my heart because I think it’s trying to say something to me. Like maybe it’s trying to say, let
Tag: dating
I wanna love something…anything…like Michael Jackson loved his monkey.
I have kids and I can handle boo-boos and potty training and questions about sex and masturbating, grades, friends, hygiene, and early girlfriends. But what
2 black cat crossing myths that are hilarious bullshit.
Myth #1 We’ve all heard of the black cat crossing your path thing, but this one takes the cake on black cat myths. There’s an
Dating tip: how to break-up with a divorced guy in 4 steps.
Dating tip: how to break-up with a divorced guy in 4 steps. I’ve never done this, but I know for sure it has worked. Take him
Rant: Paper bellies and saggy balls.
A man was talking openly and negatively to anyone around us about women who wear shirts to hide their bellies while they have sex. Bellies
We fell in love in a hopeless place.
We fell in love in a hopeless place: The checkout line at Wal-Mart. We fell in love in a hopeless place: My Netflix queue. We
He whistled at me with his stupid phone.
(It’s fun to look back on some old writing. This was written in 2005, when not everyone and their dead hamster had iPhones yet.) This